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By the time a person reaches my age, they’ve probably accumulated a significant number of pet peeves. I have one even bigger than hearing the word “sammich” and its people airing their personal business in public via their cellphone.
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Every now and then you come across something on the Internet that seems to have value or is worthwhile. The “erdle” craze fits that bill for me. These are online games that refresh themselves every day and are designed to provide you with a few minutes of entertainment in an otherwise hectic world. Wordle (https://www. nytimes.com/games/wordle/ index.html) is the first of these of which I became acquainted.
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When I was growing up there was a running joke among comedians about how awful their inlaws were, especially their mothers-in-law. Not knowing any better, I took this as a true fact and after I got a bit older, I had some friends who got married and sure enough, they married into a mess. All this solidified the myth for me that all inlaws are bad and there will be nothing but conflict with them after you marry. Boy was I wrong. I’ll start by saying this: If a marriage is a gamble, I hit the jackpot. My wife is still putting up with me after almost 30 years of having me on the Alan Shoalmire Improvement Project, despite the marginal gains that have been made. That being said, her parents are absolutely wonderful human beings.
Read moreMillions of Texas children are heading back to school this month, as early as this week in some districts. The Texas Department of Transportation urges drivers to be especially alert and focused when driving in school zones and near bus stops. Drivers are further reminded that a new Texas law requires drivers to stop and yield to pedestrians in crosswalks, according to TxDOT. The Lisa Torry Smith Act is named after a young mother killed in Missouri City in a crosswalk as she walked her son to school. The driver received a $50 fine for failing to yield, according to numerous media reports.
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Groucho Marx famously said, “I refuse to join any club that would have me as a member.” When it comes to Grimes County’s White Man’s Union Association (“WMUA”), I would say truer words were never spoken.
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In 2019, I wrote a couple of columns about late night telephone debates with my gentleman friend over his use of the words piddling, dilly dallying and frittering. I really do try to avoid constant critiquing of his use of the English language but he knows me too well. He laughs it off and says, “You just can’t help yourself;” however, his most recent mispronunciation, when said aloud, is worse than hearing Rihanna’s fingernails scrape across a blackboard. The word? “Sammich!”
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Friends, readers, and colleagues I must start this piece with a bit of a confession to make. I am not obsessed, but I do have an unusual affinity for Dixon Ticonderoga pencils. I’m not sure where or when this started, but as a writer I can tell you that they truly are the best in the world. I have at least a dozen or so at strategic locations around my house in case I get a spark of inspiration to write something. I keep some in my car, in my truck, in my desk, and in other locations as well. I probably have a couple hundred of them that I can put my hands on at any time. Why this particular writing instrument, you might ask? It just works for me, I guess. The smell of a just-sharpened pencil takes me back to elementary school, I suppose. I also have a professional grade pencil sharpener that produces a very very sharp point. So, enough about me, let’s dive into the history of this wonderful piece of engineering.
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Since I’ve been known to reference the 1973 dystopian thriller “Soylent Green” in some of my Facebook posts, I feel obligated to announce, “It’s here!” Well, not in the sense of Charlton Heston’s last line, “Green is people” but that it takes place in 2022. This year marks the 49th anniversary of that guilt inducing movie about pollution, over population, euthanasia and depleted resources.
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